Monday, March 19, 2012

Three Yogurts and a Lady

So I was at the Shop N Bag on Saturday, and along with the rest of the week's groceries I put 3 large containers of Dannon yogurt in my cart. When I got home, I didn't notice the yogurts weren't there--it wasn't until breakfast time (and that is my breakfast, 365 days a year) the next morning that I discovered they were gone. Horrors!! My AM tastebuds had no idea what to do with themselves!! I spent the rest of the weekend puzzling. Had the yogurts hopped back into the dairy case when my head was turned? I scanned my receipt--no yogurt. If Ya-Jhu hadn't been with me I'd think I was going nuts, but she swore she'd seen them too.

The mystery was solved this afternoon. I returned to the store for my yogurt fix. The checker looked at my 3 tubs of Dannon and said, "You didn't by any chance leave 3 yogurts on the counter on Saturday?" Seems on unloading the cart they hadn't made it onto the conveyor belt. Sounds like I was the talk of Shop N Bag (must've been a slow news day).

I tell this story to illustrate a point--I have become capital P Predictable. Who’s kidding whom—I have been Predictable my whole life. I am someone whose habits you could set your watch to. I park in the exact same spot every day at work (and it isn’t “reserved for” me) and the same spot in the same pew at church. I wear one fragrance, use one face cream, go to sleep in one (comfy) family room chair when watching anything on TV with more substance than America’s Next Top Model. My kids and Steve can tell you: I am afraid of elevators (and dogs and rooftops and the ocean and the list goes on), my favorite food is lobster and my adult beverage of choice is Malbec. Favorite color has always been green, favorite number 4. I hate to exercise and love to procrastinate. And I'm only 55!!! Imagine how set in my ways I will be at 70. Go ahead, you imagine—I’d prefer not to.

In my youth I dreamed of a wild gypsy future, flitting from place to place, never living the same day twice. It thrilled me to think of myself as madcap and changeable as the weather. But even then I was a creature of habit, a miniature of myself now, a laundry list of quirks, rigid in my likes and dislikes. Carving a rut in the earth with my repetitive path through my days.

But no more! I will break out of this boring pattern, I swear. I will try a new shampoo! I will use a different coffee mug! Given the encyclopedia of choices we have in life, it’s been ridiculous limiting myself this way. So bring it on, world! I’m ready to leave the Dannon on the counter and take a few chances.

Starting with breakfast. Scrambled eggs, anyone?

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