Self Improving

Which to choose?

The way things are right now, it would be all too tempting to succumb to the siren song of bad reality TV, the lightest weight chick lit offerings, wearing sweats 24/7 and eating ice cream straight from the carton. But instead, I‘m trying to get dressed every day, eat decently, and read, watch and listen to more erudite material than usual. It happens to also be Lent, which traditionally is a time for reflection in preparation for Holy Week. So, I’ve been reflecting on some of my habits and let me tell you, they need a major re-haul. And when better than now, when the supermarkets are mostly out of ice cream anyway? (I hear there’s still PLENTY of tofu, though).

Every summer when we head for the Delaware shore, I optimistically pack several canvas bags full of books, Darwin and Dickens and Dostoyevsky—and that’s only the D’s! I start off strong, lugging these weighty tomes down to the beach with me every morning. But, alas, the classics and Coppertone don’t mix very well—within the week I’m devouring the latest volume of Bridget Jones’ Diary instead. In late August I return home, shaking the sand from the unturned pages of Proust and putting Marcel back on the shelf for another year. 

 But this feels different. I’m so lucky to be healthy right now, and able to work from home. This block of extra time is rare and precious, and should be filled with only the very best in activity, information and entertainment. And so, two weeks ago I began my self-improvement journey. 

I was off to a roaring start, learning all kinds of new stuff and keeping to a pretty good schedule, but today I noticed the first signs of slippage. I had signed up (and paid for!) an online hour of Healing Meditation this afternoon. Next thing I knew, I was 15 minutes late to log on for the class. I then tried to join, but the class was “shut” and I had to leave the website, un-meditated. Demoralized, I turned to—what else?—the Healing Power of Blueberry Cupcakes. Once I’d headed down that Buttercream Road, I gave up on the day, and sought solace with my old friend Bridget Jones. 

Now, I know I could yet salvage something of March 29, 2020—at least, write out my Great Big Self-Improvement Plan for March 30, 2020. But I’m tired tonight, and those cupcakes are sitting heavily in my stomach. Far better to begin afresh in the AM! A shower and nice clothes (no sweats, please!), and a tasty tofu omelet. I’ll dig into Finnegan’s Wake again (twelfth time is the charm, right?), while listening to that new album by the Tibetan Throat-Singing Monks. 

Who am I kidding? My bad habits are cozy and comforting touchstones in a very disorienting time, yes they are! and I’m not ready to give them up yet! Tell you what--I’ll improve myself when the world straightens itself out. 

Deal?

Those wild and crazy Tibetan monks! Gotta love 'em!