Thursday, January 30, 2014

Miss You Guys

With my sister C and friend Lisa

Oh my goodness, I am absolutely awash in nostalgia today, and looking back on my life with much regret (of course) but also so many joyful memories. I used to think I was pretty good at keeping in touch, but in fact am pretty terrible at it. Boxes of letters and cards attest to the fact that, back in the day, I must have been a decent correspondent, because so many wonderful people kept up with me. Nowadays (and this is partly attributable to the advent of email and texting and evaporating records of the back-and-forth of old communication), a real physical note from someone is a treat indeed, and this is largely because I rarely write to folks myself anymore. Rarely call anyone, either. If you’re on Facebook when I am, well yay, because we just might connect. Otherwise, weeks, months and even years may pass without a peep.

But it is important to me that I say that I miss you. All of you. And I miss me, too. The precocious and (truth to tell) insufferable child, writing reams of poetry and prose and angsting all over the place. The grown-too-soon teen, escaping a challenging home life to leap into engagement at age 17, luckily with the enduring love of my life. The shattered 20-something, losing one sister and clinging to the other. The young actress. The mom of five, living a blur of diapers and feedings and time-outs and bedtime readings. All those Elises, now gone forever.

As I slog on into my late 50s, missing all the versions of me, all the memories of you, I want to send a message. I know I will forget to mention many people but here’s just a sampling…

Here’s to my childhood buddies, especially to Lisa. I’ll never forget reading Life with Mother Superior on the playground at St. Jude’s. Shout-out to my high school friends, including John, Nancy, Molly, Jeff and Paul. We have shared so much beyond our Pius High days, meeting in Atlanta and New York and Philly over the years. Closer to now, I miss Shelley and Sue and Colleen and Monica and feel stupid that we aren’t in better touch. You may not always be geographically near me and I can’t take you for granted. We raised our kids together and that is no small thing.

Besides my sis, I miss my extended family, my sisters- and brother- in- law, and their families. I miss my cousins in New York, all the time. Why don’t we get together more often? I don’t know, and time ticks inexorably on.

In the winter, I miss all my Delaware shore friends.  I also really miss Sher’s composition teacher (former Rehoboth resident), Jim.
With Becky and Dennis in Lewes

You are all so dear to me, and today you all feel very far away, as do the days memories of you evoke.

Missing is an ache that reminds me that I’m alive and, I pray to God, there’s still time.

See you soon, everybody?  Please? 

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