A Matter of Semantics

Eponymns ("Coke" is sometimes used to refer to all soda, "Band-aid" to all bandages)

In my old(ish) age of 67, I have become more and more enamored of the quirks and vagaries of language. I subscribe to several “Word of the Day” emails, and try hard to incorporate these gems into my vocab--even when they stick out like the proverbial sore thumb. I mean, WHO casually drops words like "asyndeton" (no conjunction between parts of a sentence) into their conversation? Even though I frequently write this way: I woke, I worked, I worried?

 

Then there are the “nyms,” all of which fascinate me:

 

Homonyms--pronounced same, different meanings (bear, bright-- and that’s just some B’s)

Synonyms--different words mean the same (happy, joyful)

Antonyms—words that mean the opposite of one another (gleeful, miserable)

Heteronyms—words that are spelled the same and pronounced differently (bass the fish and bass the instrument)

Metonyms—word standing in for a word to which it’s closely associated (“brass” for “military”)

Acronyms--LOL, ROFL, FOMO, and so forth. GMAB!*Give Me A Break. (I made that one up)

Hyponyms—one word used as part of a whole (football/sports).

 

But my favorite “nym” is the aptronym. This describes people whose names coincidentally describe their jobs. You know, Mr. Cook works in a—restaurant. Dr. Payne is a—dentist. Ms. Taylor is a--legendary movie star (JK, Ms. Taylor works as a—seamstress). Bob “Barker”, the longtime host of “The Price is Right," hawking washing machines and sports cars. “Pope” Francis, an actual pontiff! A fun fact: even as a tiny tot, Francis' mates would call out, “Hey Pope! Give us back our football (soccer ball)!” Being the pope and all, he probably climbed into his mini Popemobile and pedaled away, holding the soccer (foot) ball, smiling and waving in Italian.

 

If we could choose our aptronymical names, I’d probably be Mrs. Wright (er). Stevo would be Mr. Player (acting, acting!), and Sher and Yaj would be the Tunes. But ours is not a perfect world, so we are just Seyfrieds, which means “peaceful victory.” That’s a little lame, don’t you think? I prefer snatching victory from defeat’s crushing jaws; “peaceful victory” sounds like two warring nations just gradually losing interest, yawning, and drifting away from the battlefield.

 

Not sure where this later in life passion for the minutiae of grammar comes from. I’ve been a writer for decades, with no real curiosity about semantics (study of meaning in language) at all. Why care now? 

 

I can only surmise (Word of the Day!) that, as my sojourn here on Earth grows shorter, I am examining every aspect of my existence, to plumb it all for true meaning before it’s too late. 

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m trying to build a case for my new, invented category--the goofynym. Goofynyms are words relating to either silly behavior, or Disney’s A Goofy Movie's eponymous character (dog? Or..what?) 

 

Eponymous: a person/thing which has something named after them. Bingo! I just used Wednesday’s Word of the Day! (Peaceful) victory is mine!

Usain "Bolt" (get it?), world's fastest man