Serendipitous Synchronicity

With my friend Michael, an amazing link to my sister

Synchronicity: meaningful coincidence

Serendipity: finding something valuable and delightful when you were not looking for it

I’m pretty sure actor Michael Baran was not expecting to find my book Unhaling in the waiting room of his doctor’s office in New Jersey that day.

I know I was not expecting to hear from him after almost 40 years.

But my book just happened to be there, he just happened to pick it up, and he just happened to recognize the person who wrote it—the sister of a girl he used to date, Maureen Cunningham.

I do a lot of mental gymnastics when things like this happen. My “logical” side says “totally random event.” What are the odds that four young people, living in Atlanta at the same time in the late ‘70’s, would connect in a way that would still resonate so many years later after no contact at all, three of them reunited in remembrance of the fourth, who died much too soon?

My sister Mo was involved, as a teenager, in a Catholic youth movement called “Search.” As the name implied, she was searching for God, for a way forward in a pretty chaotic life. She found a supportive community of young people who became her dear friends. During her time as a Search participant, she met Michael, and they dated for a while. Michael was contemplating a theatre career. Mo arranged for him to meet Steve and me (and in fact, Steve and I spoke at a Search gathering). The advice we gave him, though certainly not earth-shattering, still apparently made an impression (“get lots of experience performing, go to college for theatre, then go to New York”).

And so the decades passed. We lost my beautiful sister in October, 1981. We left Atlanta, settled in Philly, raised our family. I became a church worker and writer, and published the first of my four books in 2010. And then, out of the blue (or not?), Michael reached out to me. After several years of Facebook messaging, there was finally an opportunity to meet again face to face, last Monday in Manhattan. Michael had been cast in an off-off Broadway showcase. I decided to go up and see the play, and Rose, Julie and Gil met me in New York.

After the show, we waited in the lobby. I admit to being nervous, especially at the prospect of introducing him to my daughters, whose only contact with their Aunt Mo was pictures and stories. I needn’t have fretted. Michael was so gracious, and told some wonderful stories of their dates and what she had meant to him. He regards Mo as one of his muses, watching over him from Heaven as he continues to perform.

Skeptics will say that all of this was mere happenstance. I prefer to call it serendipitous synchronicity. Standing in the theatre lobby that night, I could see my Mo, smiling at this random group of people who loved her. Who love her still.

Maureen Cunningham 1957-1981