Humans of Anywhere

   

Grand Central Station NYC (photo by Guillaume Lorain on Unsplash)

As a child living in Manhattan, I observed my grownups, and learned the drill for safely moving through the big city. Keep eyes straight ahead, walk quickly and confidently. Do not engage in small talk with strangers, on the street or in an elevator. Never look at a stranger’s face, lest you lock eyes with a serial killer. 

 

Even after moving out to the suburbs, my sisters and I remained wary. In case we wavered, Mom would trot out her horror story: in her teens, she’d been offered a ride by a man she thought was the tennis pro at the country club. Once Joanie got in the car, she realized it was not, in fact, anyone she knew. The unknown man said to her, “You don’t know me, do you? I’m going to stop the car now. Get out and run.” Which she did. 

 

Mom’s tale made quite an impression on us as little girls. One rainy day, our neighbor pulled up beside us as we walked home from school, asking if we wanted a ride. We vehemently shook our heads and sprinted away. Even though it was obvious that it was a kindly woman we’d known for years, we weren’t about to risk it! Far safer to slog home in a downpour!

 

My paranoia has diminished somewhat, but I can never shake the vague fear surrounding any encounter with a stranger. So, I was fascinated to discover Brandon Stanton and the Humans of New York project. How can a young man be brave enough to ask to photograph random people on the streets of the big city? Now mind you, Brandon being a male clearly makes a difference in this calculation, but still—it must’ve taken guts to approach, camera in hand. His immediate goal was to take pictures of 10,000 people.

 

Over time, he realized that his subjects each had stories to tell—amazing, funny, tragic, beautiful stories. And so, he began writing the stories down, and sharing them, along with the photos, on his website. Many of the stories were troubling—people in dire situations, battling severe health challenges, living on the street. Then came the pandemic, and bad situations got much, much worse. Brandon wanted to do more than just snap a picture, so he set up Go Fund Me campaigns that have raised millions of dollars and helped people--from the immigrant parents of a seriously ill child, to a man blinded in a subway attack—get back on their feet. 

Brandon’s current goal is to help his once strangers/now friends get enough funds to achieve “escape velocity.” This is a term in astronomy, but Brandon defines it in these cases as “liberation from the gravity of their own circumstances.” It is a wonderful cause.

How about me? Can I overcome my reluctance to engage? Do I dare to make eye contact--and heart contact--with a stranger? I don’t know.

But nowadays, when we are dangerously de-humanizing one another, maybe I’d better try.

                     Humans of New York

Under Pressure

So much pressure!
Image by Crystal Kwok on Unsplash

Before our flight to Europe last year, I bought a pair of compression socks for the first time. I was starting to have an issue with swollen feet on long flights, and had heard that wearing these socks would eliminate that possibility. I discovered that those socks feel SUPER uncomfortable (at least to me)—really tight and confining. I couldn’t wait to take them off when we got to the hotel. Lo and behold though: zero swelling. So, the compression, miserable as it made me feel, actually served a purpose.  

I recently read about the Hebrew term meitzar. Meitzar means “narrow place, a place of compression.” It is an expression of the circumstances that can make life seem impossibly difficult—and certainly in Scripture, there were many tough spots in which humans found themselves. And that hasn’t changed much through the centuries. 

 

For what is our world today but a giant pressure cooker? We are surrounded by pain and trouble, and it seems like everything is closing in on us—an endless cascade of natural disasters, violence, intolerance, disease. Reading or watching the news can give us a tightness in the chest, and even take our breath away. Where is the redemption in this suffering world? Is there any meaning to the struggle at all?

 

The expression “hitting rock bottom” seems to fit with our world situation these days. As people scream at each other across vast political divides, as babies die of hunger and men fight endless wars and earthquakes and floods threaten to wipe us all out, it’s fair to wonder how far down our downward spiral will take us.

 

In Psalm 118, the psalmist writes: “From the meitzar (narrow place) I called to God.” But God, it continues, answered “from expansiveness.” In other words, where and when we are feeling the most pressure, God’s response is to give us relief. 

 

What I’m coming to understand is that, like the socks, the compression of meitzar may be necessary, may be the only way to get us to the place we need to be. An uncomfortable kind of healing, perhaps, but healing nonetheless, leading at last to the delight of wholeness and joy.

 

So the next time you feel as if you are in the meitzar, hang onto this thought: there is a path upward, and out of the struggle. We need to work, together, to clear that path for one another. And as we work, we need to remember. Remember what we are learning as we live through these hard times: Empathy. Compassion. Fortitude. Endurance. Grace. All gifts. Gifts the world needs so very much. 

 

Instead of shrinking from reality, let’s try embracing it. Hugging it hard. Squeezing the lessons out of even the toughest times. Because the lessons are there to be learned. And, as we are compressed in this narrow and difficult place, let’s try staying focused on the upward path, where we will be healed. Made whole. And, please Lord, be given relief at last. 

The Secret of My (Quiz Show) Success

  

With two composers in the house, I'd better do well with Piano Puzzler!

What’s my formula for consistently winning on radio quiz shows? Here it is (whispers):

 

Never go on the air.

 

That’s it! That’s the secret!! 

 

My victory streak extends way back to my teens, when I did very well listening to the BBC show, My Word! Hosted by the hilarious Frank Muir and Denis Norden, this was a rapid-fire panel program about word origins and definitions. Each episode concluded with one of them telling a feghoot. You know, a feghoot?

 

Oh, all right.

 

A feghoot is a funny story that ends with a groaner pun that directly relates to the story. I won’t write one out because they’re all pretty lengthy and convoluted, but I’ll give you one of the pun-chlines and let you guess about the story: “Where there’s a whale there’s a Y” (hint: something about Moby Dick).

 

Since then, I’ve become a superfan of many quizzes, and often can beat the actual on-air competitor to the correct answer (this also holds true with Jeopardy on TV, btw). My current favorites include the NPR weekly news quiz Whaddayaknow? and the Piano Puzzler feature on Performance Today. For the former, you really just have to be an avid consumer of current news (which I am!), although they do have tricky variations—such as presenting three “news” stories, only one of which is true. 

 

In the latter case, composer Bruce Adolphe comes up with a tune based on a real song, but in the style of a certain classical composer--for instance, a disguised version of “I Left My Heart in San Francisco” as if Mozart wrote it. It’s a two parter—you have to guess the song AND the composer being imitated. Piano Puzzler is a very forgiving feature. They REALLY want the caller to win, and drop massive hints: “Yes, it IS a baroque composer, Kathy, very good!!! But it’s not Handel. Think back about other composers. No, not Scarlatti. Think BACK. B...ACH! Johann Sebastian…” “Bach?” "Excellent work, Kathy! You guessed it!!” 

 

If you are unlucky enough to be a passenger in my car when one of these gems is on, our conversation will be interrupted by my shrieking; “It’s INDIA! The G-20 was in INDIA!! What’s wrong with you??”” or maybe “It’s ‘Some Enchanted Evening’ and Chopin, you numbskull!” I always use a scornful tone, to convey my very superior intellect.

 

So why not actually call in sometime? 

 

Nah. With that kind of pressure (and an audience), I’m positive my brain would instantly fail me. Can’t imagine anything more mortifying than freezing up in earshot of thousands of people. No, I’d rather continue my unbroken streak as a champion without risking anything. 

 

Let others humiliate themselves as they blow their chance at the grand prize (on Jeopardy it’s actually good money; the radio shows offer more modest rewards—like announcer Bill Curtis recording your voice mail message). 

 

Whaddayaknow? 

 

I know a LOT. I’m just not telling the world, OK?

 

Remember: you can’t lose if you don’t play. 

Image by Arek Socha on Pixabay

Who is Gen Z Anyway?

flip phone (they're baaack)--photo by Alexander Andrews on Unsplash

Also known as iGen and Centennials, the Z’s are the young people born between 1997 and 2012. 

As a Baby Boomer myself, parent of five Millennials, and grandparent of two Alphas, I felt the need to brush up on my understanding of the Gen Z’ers all around me--making lattes at Starbucks, starting the tech companies that will power the coming decades, that kind of thing. 

 

Who are these strange young creatures, and why are they all getting flip phones, wearing low-rise jeans and listening to (early) Weezer? Well, it seems they are very nostalgic about what they think of as the good old days. Now, to me, nostalgia still conjures up sepia-toned images of paper boys on bikes and glass milk bottles in metal boxes, and three channels on my rabbit-eared TV. But for these guys, that’s just waaaaayyy too long ago to imagine. To a Gen Z’er, the 1990's is plenty far back in time to remember, the Ancient of Days Before Wifi.

 

What are some other signs that you are in the presence of a Z?

 

They are: 

                  *Very anxious about their future (gee, with COVID, increasing societal divisiveness, and a planet going up in flames, I wonder why they’re worried?)

                  *Really diverse and accepting. They see no value in all of us looking, thinking and acting exactly the same.  Instead, they celebrate what makes us each unique and special.

                 *Financially conservative (at their age I was still a faithful member of the Columbia Record Club, with a checking account balance of $3.50.) They see the wisdom in savings and careful investment.

                 *Avid travelers, and they’re not afraid to roam the world on the cheap (see above for reason)

                *Smart digital consumers. They’re seeing the down side of 24/7 online, and giving themselves mental health breaks from technology (hence the flip phones).

 

But that’s not all!

                 

They have coined some new abbreviations when they are online. Example: no more LOL (which too many boomers thought meant “lots of love” instead of "laughing out loud," a tad odd when used in response to news of Great Grandma’s death). Now it’s the more evocative, and harder to misconstrue, IJBOL (I Just Burst Out Laughing). 

Emojis tend to be used ironically, more than literally. As for me, I rely on the simple smiley or heart for ALL occasions, and I don’t know what I’d do if faced with something like 😬. That one either means “awkward” or “I still have all my teeth.” I think. Side note (which I learned the hard way): Never end a text sentence with a period. It makes you seem angry. Unless you really are angry, in which case, go ahead.

                  

In summary, Gen Z'ers, like the rest of us, are just trying to navigate the world, and create lives of meaning and purpose. I send them love, forgive them for the revival of Uggs, and can’t wait to see what the Alphas have in store for them when THEY become the oldsters!