In the Soup

I just read a lovely article written by a woman from Pakistan who now lives in the U.S.  She was raised Sindhi Hindu, and wrote about her faith, and the traditional food that was so important to her. She focused on a sweet rice dish called tahri, rich with the flavors of cardamom, saffron and fennel seed. Cooking tahri has been a way for her to celebrate her culture, and keep memory alive. 

I’m often frustrated by my blah culinary heritage. What is the point of writing about Swanson's TV dinners, my childhood suppertime staple? To say the Salisbury steak tasted OK as long as there weren’t ice crystals? Now THERE's a delightful reminiscence! Thoroughly Irish as we were, we never once ate Irish stew or even cabbage. Steve had a different background (German), but even he was limited to German potato salad and springerle Christmas cookies. 

So I am entranced by Foods of the World. And I hit the jackpot (or rather, soup pot) when I learned about fanesca. Fanesca is a time-consuming, labor intensive soup that is hugely important in Ecuador, especially during Lent. Families make fanesca together, prepping the multitude of ingredients over several days. As it just happens to be Lent, when our church offers weekly potluck soup suppers, I hatched my ambitious plan. We would make fanesca!! It would be a festive family affair!!

My fanesca! With traditional toppings (red peppers and fried plantains)! Whew!!

The more I learned about this soup, the more intrigued I became. Legend has it that the early Christians met in secret, each bringing a different ingredient for this communal dish. There’s religious symbolism attached to the various items in fanesca too. Salt cod, the fish a symbol of Jesus. Twelve different veggies and grains for the twelve apostles, including corn, rice, leeks, roasted garlic. lupini, peanuts. Everything is cooked in milk. 

As I brought my haul home from several markets, I began to feel a bit daunted. My happy family plan was going bust, because everyone is too busy right now to pitch in (both Sheridan and Ya-Jhu work at churches and, as noted, it IS Lent). Wednesday morning, I left a note on the dining room table next to a big bowl filled with dried fava beans that had soaked overnight and needed to be individually peeled: "Can someone please do me a 'fava' and peel the beans while I'm at work?" Evan came to the rescue and peeled a pound of beans (and they don't peel easily). 

The fruits (beans) of Evan's labor

Final cooking took three hours. Wednesday night I brought the finished product down to church, where it handily served 13 people with leftovers. The verdict? It really was delicious. Worth the work? Not sure. But it was a fun challenge.

Food is far, far more than fuel…it is a window on the way we live our lives. Nowadays, when so many seem to be circling the wagons, let’s instead share a pot of soup, and some love, with our brothers and sisters of ALL nations,  on this planet we all call home.

Fabulous 40

 March 19, 1977: No #1 Song: “Evergreen” with Barbra Streisand (from A Star is Born). The final episode of The Mary Tyler Moore Show aired. Once again, the swallows flew back to Capistrano on the Feast of St. Joseph.

And oh yeah. We got married.

Yup. Us

 Looking back, I realize I was just a baby: 20. We’d been engaged three years. It seemed like we’d been a couple forever, the wedding itself a logical punctuation mark (!?) in the Story of Us. It was a small, but lovely, ceremony. We took off for NYC and our short honeymoon that afternoon. I am amazed at the details I recall (that last episode of The MTM Show? We pulled off the highway for the night just to watch it. Priorities!) In a few days, we saw three Broadway shows, ate several splurge dinners, and arrived home on gas fumes. And the future stretched endlessly before us.

1997. We observed our 20^th anniversary with four days on Nantucket Island. We had no business going anywhere at that point. Our theatre company was struggling and we were too. Common sense tells you that when you have to track the grocery money to the dollar every week, it may not be prime time for a long-distance fling (not to mention leaving your five young kids, watched by saintly sister C). But 20 is 20, after all, and the future still stretched before us, though maybe not so endlessly.

March 19, 2017. 40 years today since that young couple joined hands on an altar in Atlanta. World events too depressing to recount, though the #1 Song is “Shape of You” by Ed Sheeran, which gives me hope. Meaning, I hope I figure out who the heck Ed Sheeran is. I take inventory: Five grown kids. Two incredible grandsons. Our theatre company has not only survived, but (kinda) thrived. I’ve spread my tentative wings to become a Lutheran spiritual formation director and a freelance writer. Who knew, the morning we said, “I do”, exactly what we WOULD do? The future stretches before us still, but we see the end of the runway, and it’s an unsettling feeling.

Will we make it to March 19, 2037? What will the world be like then? Impossible to imagine, and at that point our future will no doubt stretch before us only day by day. But I have this constant, as I have had for the past 40 years: my partner, my husband, my very best friend, Steve. Whatever the future holds, I pray it holds us together still.

So here we are. Tonight, March 19, 2017, we are going out to dinner, at a little spot in suburban Philadelphia. We aren’t counting the dollars quite as closely as we once did, but it’s still nice that it’s a BYOB. On this almost-spring Sunday evening, may we cherish the years, months, weeks, days, and hours ahead. And may we celebrate this longest (so far) and happiest of anniversaries. I love you, honey.

Us, Today

It's All About the OCEAN

I avoid those silly Facebook quizzes (Which Harry Potter Character Are You?), recognizing that they shed little light on who I am. Human beings are far more complicated than any test can really assess. For a while there, the Myers-Briggs alphabet soup was very popular. “Me? Oh, I’m a QWERTYUIOP!” I would respond, then duck out before my questioner realized I had just recited the top line of the typing keyboard.

So why did I just take the trendy Big Five personality test?  I was curious, more than anything else. What amazing new insights about Elise Seyfried might be uncovered? The Big Five (acronym OCEAN) are Openness to New Experiences, Conscientiousness, Extroversion, Agreeableness and (my fave) Neuroticism. I was excited! Would I finally have a handle on “me” after 60 years?

My results:

O (Openness) I am NOT open to new experiences. True. From ziplining in Costa Rica to parallel parking in Philly, “no thank you” is my go-to reaction. Give me comfy old experiences every time! I never tire of re-reading my favorite books, re-watching my favorite movies, re-eating my favorite meals. If you only live once, I am perfectly happy to spend my one life repeating myself.

C (Conscientiousness)  I am neither organized, nor disorganized. Also true. I am careful about my appearance, and can pull things together at work well enough. Yet beneath the façade is chaos, chaos I tell you! I am a closet slob (meaning, if you open my closets you will learn that I am a slob.)

E (Extroversion) I am relatively social and enjoy the company of others. To this I say: what others? I do not enjoy the company of just any “others.” And my general sociability ebbs and flows; some days I am Ginny Gregarious, and some days I would rather converse with my pillow (these are GREAT conversations, in which my opinion always wins the day).

A (Agreeableness) I am (by their rating) not extremely forgiving. I do recall my little grudges, my petty annoyances. I was often irked by my in-laws, because I hated their complacence and lack of intellectual curiosity. Once, watching a game show on TV together, the question was: would you rather be smart and unhappy, or dumb and happy? Guess which one I chose? Guess which one they chose? Now, many years later, I am much more understanding of them, and am starting at last to see the value of happy in this crazy world.

N (Neuroticism) I am a “generally anxious person and tend to worry about everything.” Hmmm. Well. Yes. But why on earth would that be called “neurotic”? To me, that is a totally normal reaction to life! Besides, if nobody worried, many many more bad things would happen! Worry keeps the devil at bay! You’re welcome.

Do tests like the Big Five really prove anything? Should I work on my conscientiousness, my openness, my extroversion? Should I strive to be more agreeable, less neurotic? In other words, is knowledge power?

Nah.

Life of the Party (sometimes)